Bin Laden is at Dunkin Donuts

A Top-Secret US Government report is hiding the fact that Osama Bin Laden has been working at the Dunkin Donuts in Sommerville, MA for over 3 years. Witnesses are outraged that Bin Laden has been hiding in plain view for so long.

"I went into DD's for a Coolata", said Rick Shroeder, a Harvard undergrad, "Bin Laden was behind the counter".

Government officials deny that the man behind the counter is Bin Laden claiming that the man is actually Jose Manuel Y Pedro Rodrigues, a Venezuelan exchange student. Other sources claim that Bin Laden has simply gotten a face lift and trimmed his beard.

"He is 6'4, just like Bin Laden", said Julie Sommers, a lighting saleswoman from Mwethuen. "If you add 20 years and give him a longer beard and attach him to a kidney dialysis machine they would look identical".

He's not Bin Laden", said FBI Special Agent Jeff "Curley" White, "He's just some flunky who looks a little like him".

Many others are not so sure. Could this be Bin Laden hiding in plain view all this time? Is the FBI simply too red-faced embarrassed to admit the truth?

ARE YOU OUTRAGED???